Panic!

The Bar panic has hit. Stephanie and I went to the beach house for the fourth. We stayed three days and did absolutely no work, which was great except when we got back people were taking about how they only did 12 practice essays over the break. Seriously?! Twelve essays?! Holy crap, are we behind. We continue to work less hard than everyone else, and now that we have 3 hours of Le Tour to watch every day, this is apt to stay true. I definitely do not feel ready for the essays or the performance tests, but I can tell I am getting more familiar with the law and better and writing he answers. I also can't help but feel that we are studying smarter than a lot of people. Yesterday, none of the "too busy t do anything fun" people even showed up to the mock exam. It was six hours of hell, particularly when the AC went off for two hours and the room was sweltering, but I thought, "This could happen on game-day, and I won't be able to leave, so I better keep working." I felt like a total freakin' moron by the end and was confident I would fail. To recover, Stephanie and I watched 6 hours of TV. If it hadn't been 108 degrees outside, I would have gone for a long bike ride. I felt awful!

Today I went over the answers and discovered that I did worse than I thought in some areas, and better than I thought in others I could see what I need to work on, where I wasted my time during the performance test, and why I had so much time left over after the essays. I am starting to narrow in on where I go wrong so I can fix it. In addition, that's three more essays I have done, and one more PT test. Perhaps most importantly, fear is very motivating, so I have reason to persevere.

As for my weight loss and fitness goals, I made some progress before the fourth and got myself down below 155, but the Fourth brought me back and now I am hovering around 155. I think I may be retaining water because I have been scarfing down salty, dried seaweed as comfort food so I don't eat something more damaging. Tomorrow I hope to go for a two hour ride again, but they cause me to eat everything in sight the next day, so I am going to have to work on my recovery strategies. I have also realized that my progress is bound to be slower because my back limits the intensity I can exercise at, and also means I have to increase intensity in slower increments. Intervals are fabulous, but they wreak havoc on my back and then I can't do much for a while. The bike is becoming much more comfortable, and I can tell I am getting fitter. Now that I can ride for a longer time without everything hurting for a week, I can start upping my sped and become a respectable rider. Its getting to be pretty fun and the trail is so pretty that I look forward to going out.

I have a job lined up in August...I think. I haven't heard back from anyone, but I had the job when I left 2 weeks ago. I will be working with the American Electronics Association as a lobbyist. It's not in the education field, but they were willing to take me on with no lobbying experience, everyone at the office is great, the salary is fair given my experience in the field, plus I get to work minutes from home. I tend to think I am going to find a way to make this job work with my education goals, but even if that doesn't happen, once I learn how to lobby, understand how the legislature works, and build a reputation, I can do anything I want. Hurray!